Dependability is a high-ranking “soft skill” that employers, colleagues and customers desire.
When it comes to your career, there are many worthwhile investments you can make to sharpen the saw of your particular expertise. On top of this, try to cultivate a reputation for being dependable. People want to know that they can count on you, and that your word is reliable.
Don’t make the mistake of thinking that so-called soft skills are not trainable. All of them are. For this particular skill, all you have to do is make sure you always do what you say.
It’s healthy to have desires, goals, and hopes for better versions of the future. But so often we fall victim to as-soon-as syndrome, making our desires much like contracts we make with ourselves to be unhappy until we get what we want.
Defining and striving for things in line with our desires is essential. Just be sure you’re not trading a possible future for an unmistakable now.
My music has received over 50 million streams and downloads, hundreds 5-star ratings, and the kindest reviews and compliments. Yet I can recite verbatim the ruthless critique of my voice from an anonymous user 10 years ago. A decade-old review from one person.
This is negativity bias in action. We’re all susceptible to it. We too quickly forget the praise we receive and tend to highlight the cynical people and opinions.
I keep an email folder called “inspiration” where I file the kind words I’ve received from people who clearly value what I do. It helps to keep a reminder that most of the time you’re doing a stellar job.
Dysfunctional and self-limiting beliefs can be thrust upon us by culture and society. Some beliefs feel like obvious truths because they’re so deeply conditioned.
What is your one true passion? Who says we have to pick one thing to be passionate about? Is choice A or B the best? Why does everything have to be a zero-sum contest where everyone aside from one winner is a loser?
There are no rules. You can have just one passion, but it’s possible (and probable) that you’ll have have multiple passions. Especially at different times of your life. The unattainable “best” is the enemy of multiple “betters”.
Great questions may be the most powerful tool we have for honest introspection. The most transformative questions are usually simple while being the most difficult to answer.
All of us know of people or scenarios that continue to cause us emotional pain. Blaming others (even when it’s warranted) is not helpful. It doesn’t mitigate future issues, and worse, it allows you to side-step any of the blame.
Here is the most profound question I’ve learned to force honest introspection when history repeats itself in a negative way: How am I complicit in creating the conditions that I say I don’t want?
One thing that keeps us from being a nicer person than we would be otherwise is our tendency to judge others.
Next time you catch yourself judging someone for their clothing, their hairstyle, interests, or hobbies, ask: Do I have similar attributes that could be judged by others? Then ask yourself the more important question: Why does this matter?
The more you train yourself to not care about the personal preferences of other people, the nicer and more relaxed you become as a person.
The mental subtraction method is an alternate way to elicit the feeling of gratitude.
As an alternative to looking at the bright side or paying attention to all that you have for which you feel grateful, try visualizing the absence of the people, things, and moments in your life that make it most meaningful.
Force yourself to consider the impact on your life without the the people, places, things, and experiences that are so valuable. Returning to the present moment after a short time contemplating these negative thoughts offers an unconventional but useful way to spark gratitude.